Walking the Path of Pain
by nemaara
Summary: The five great nations are at war once more, and battle is sure to cross over into many smaller countries including Amegakure. However, the Akatsuki has reformed a while ago and now pursues a path of peace rather than war, with the exception of Madara, who has left with the Gedo Mazo and wishes to pursue his own plans. Konan-centric, Konan/Nagato (not Pain) pairing.
1. Storm

Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto

In times of war, in times of strife, we fight with all our life. Those who have fallen shall rise again, those who were dead live once more. Hope, our greatest friend and ally, guides us in our path, and whether we are let astray or not, we find ourselves with the courage to continue on - Konan and Pain, beginning life anew.

Revamped from the original - The five great nations are at war again, and Amegakure is caught in the middle of it. The Akatsuki has, for the most part, abandoned its original goals and Madara is no longer a part of the organization, although most of the remaining group is still together and in Amegakure. (Sasori, Deidara, Itachi, Kisame, Konan, and Nagato). Nagato has found a way to restore his body to its former status, and now he no longer uses the six paths of pain. Konan will be a lot more powerful than she is in canon Naruto, and Naruto won't be as strong as canon. Still Konan centric. More revealed in story-

"Speech"

_Thoughts_

* * *

_The world churns again. One cycle after another, life slips into ceaseless strife, boundless hatred. This game we call life, a fool's game, and we, the biggest fools of them all, why do we even play it? I see the world crumble before my eyes, fallen into despairing chaos, anarchy abound... here we maintain some semblance of calm, but war comes soon, the bitter winds of battle staining heaven's rain red with blood, carving unto the land a vast crypt, scorching everything in its path with unforgiving fire. Our time draws near again, our fate decided against the leaves of war. A proliferation of carnage, all the lost souls crying out to me, and I, their angel, can do nothing but sit back and watch it happen, helpless, caught in the midst of an immutable impetus, the force that causes these humans to fight each other, the catalyst of pain in this world._

_Sometimes we ask ourselves why. Why so much hatred for one another? What purpose does it serve? Is it useful, or are we just hurting each other... and ourselves? We are all justified in our causes. Or so it seems. Every village, every single person does what he, what she feels is right. We help ourselves, we say we are the morally sound ones, we are good, and they are evil. They are just... wrong. Yes, our own hatred is always justified, we are always right in causing others pain, but they are never right if they want to retaliate. What peace we seek is only a lie, tailored to our own needs, to our own wants, what bonds we hold with others merely a disguise, easily evaporated when truth is revealed. Friends, who are not really our friends, who abandon us in times of need, leaving us alone again, solitary guardians of a dying world._

_Silent watchers of ceaseless destruction, hapless protectors of those who cannot be defended, we hope for a world without war, without hate, but where one conflict ends another arises. Those we call our friends are our worst enemies a moment later, those our most hated foes our allies the next, but when in the hour of dire need, the only one you can rely on is yourself. Alone, we hope for something better, together, we destroy those dreams, dashing those illusions of harmony with one another, cast into despair once more. For desolation does not rise until hope ends, and there does pain return. _

_Winter comes again, snowfall at the eve of rising flame, glacial frost soon given into raging fire, nothing to quell the pyres that raze all creation to ashes. The ashen skies reign over an ashen world, casting white flakes unto a blackened ground, a shroud for the fallen, each one a fallen soul itself. A myriad of snowflakes from the heavens, a myriad of spirits lost in battle, spectres haunting this hellish plane, tormented life worse than death, dispassionate shadows wandering listlessly through boundless chaos. Discordant harmonies, that which we call concord, unity of naught but abhorrent furies, fervent in nothing but fighting, passionless otherwise._

_Helpless, I claim to be angel, messenger of an equally powerless god, who only can watch as her people die, suffer, and live on as more powerful forces ravage our lands. Mortal, we all are, yet some more so than others, fallen easily upon winds of hate, while others watch from above. Seeing such foolishness but unable to do anything about it. Interfering with it and hated all the more so because of it. In the wake of the giants' fight we are left to clean up by ourselves, to rebuild, to recover. Standing in the shadows of titans we can only watch, and wait for a time when they stop fighting. Invariably, we are left waiting for the end of eternity. _

_Beneath these grey skies I fly, seeing everything, yet nothing with these eyes, as everything dies, if I could still I would cry. My heart sings for them but I feel nothing. Nothing but bitterness and disappointment, hatred consuming me as well, but cleansed as I hear this lie, this lie they call amity, this lie that tears the world asunder. I feel naught for those who strive beneath me, cold as the ice that falls around me, frozen within a wintry shell, muted ardor, abated fervor, I cannot allow myself to feel or I will be lost as well. Lost in the throes of malevolence, I become no better than those I scorn, purging it from my body, I still cling to those ideals of peace._

_What was past is not forgotten, what is present cannot be controlled, what will be the future cannot be foreseen. All we can do is live. And carry on. In this life, we seek out the things that bring us happiness, or lessen our own despair. Most wish to erase their own pain as well, but for us it is not the case. This pain, it eats away at my soul, yet it drives me forward as well. To improve myself, to grow stronger, smarter, to understand others better, the will to make progress in this world. To progress from the anarchy that it is now. Pain, the impetus that gives me the will to live, Pein, my only friend and ally. Though it is not what other seek, it is what he and I both relish, though we may wish to erase it from others' lives. _

_There is no sun in Amegakure. Only the endless rain, washing away the sorrows of years past, or the veils of snow, a curtain to mute the pain of ceaseless war. With nothing we yet live. With our lives, we struggle on, and in death only then do we find peace. Such is our existence, such is what we are doomed to suffer. So while we still live, we must keep fighting. Without hope, I have not yet given up, without motivation to do anything, I still devote my soul to this concept, this thing that seems that it cannot be achieved, peace. We strive for perfection but cannot attain it, we seek to do the impossible, knowing that it cannot be done. Some of us give up, overcome by hopelessness, and yet some of us continue on, knowing we cannot do anything but striving forward anyway. _

_Here, in the frozen rains, I look into the sky, and wonder, when will it end? _

_The answer, as always... never. _

Konan's looked down and her face contorted very slightly. A bead of sweat ran down her forehead and she raised a hand to wipe it away, frowning to herself. She hated being sick.

* * *

"Tsunade, you know I have to do this. I know that Iwa declared war on us again-"

"If you know that, then why are you still doing this?!" Tsunade slammed her palm on her desk, breaking it in half (again). "Kumogakure is allies with Iwagakure! We're not just dealing with the Earth country this time, Jiraiya! We-"

"We also have Suna on our side. Listen to me, Tsunade. I have information from a _very _good source that the leader of Akatsuki is in Amegakure. I at least have to check it out."

Tsunade sighed. "And what if you, well..."

Jiraiya snorted. "I'm not stupid enough to get caught by a bunch of amateurs-"

"Jiraiya, this is the _Akatsuki _we're talking about. Look. We've got a ton of issues on our hands. Iwagakure, Kumogakure, hell you can probably bet that Kirigakure won't stay out of it either. We _need _you. If something happens and-"

Jiraiya looked at her seriously. "Nothing is going to happen. I promise you."

"Yeah, sure. Nothing will stop you from keeping your sennin's promise-"

Jiraiya rolled his eyes. "You know, if it makes you feel any better I could bring along a couple people with me. Two at most, so we'll have a three man reconnaissance team."

Tsunade was silent. Well, on the one hand, itwould make her feel better, but on the other hand, they were short handed right now, and she couldn't exactly spare many people. Still, the Akatsuki was a big deal, and even with the rumors floating around that their activities had stopped and they weren't collecting bijuu anymore, nobody could be certain what they were actually up to. It wasn't a good idea to leave them alone for too long, even if they were preoccupied with war. And sending Jiraiya alone..?

Well, he certainly was a capable shinobi, she knew that. Few came close to him in infiltration and stealth techniques, which was why he was perfectly suited to go to Amegakure and gather intel on whoever the leader of Akatsuki might be. But he was not infallible. She had seen before, he sometimes got a bit reckless when alone... perhaps he felt like he needed to be the hero or something, but he risked his life as if it were nothing. Perhaps sending someone with him would be for the best after all. The question was, who was there?

He noticed her thinking about it. "Kakashi, perhaps? Or Yamato?"

"Kakashi is staying with Naruto for the moment, and I doubt you want to take _him _to Amegakure with you."

Jiraiya nodded. That would be disastrous.

"Yamato... how long will you be there?"

"In and out in hopefully a week," he muttered, "unless we encounter... trouble."

"Ugh. Fine, Yamato will go with you. And one more person... the problem is, all of the other jounin and ANBU that I can think of are already at the border on duty. Yamato just happens to still be here because Naruto is. And I doubt Danzo would approve of sending any of his men with you."

"So a chuunin. I know we have some particularly talented ones in the village. That bug guy, what was his name?"

"Shino? He's with his father on the front as well. Let me think." Tsunade put a hand to her chin. Team Asuma - well, Team Shikamaru now - was also on the front already. Team Kurenai had already met up with their old mentor and gone as well, so they were out of the question. In fact... now that she thought of it, most of the old teams were already prepared for battle at the border. The only ones still in the village were Team Gai and Team Kakashi. _Gai's team... that would be a terrible idea. _Tsunade shuddered to think of what would happen if she sent Lee on a stealthy recon mission. And Neji was already gone with the rest of the Hyuugas, so that left Team Kakashi. Sai would have been perfect but then there was the possible connection to Danzo, and she wanted him as far away from the intel as possible... though he somehow always managed to get his hands on it. Naruto... no. And Kakashi had to stay with him. So that left...

"Sakura, I guess," she muttered. "Not ideal but she's basically the only one available. As long as she isn't away long, we won't miss her too much."

"Sai? Oh right, Danzo," Jiraiya's face darkened. Not many people liked the old man, especially not those who agreed with the Third's teachings. "There's really nobody else?"

"Unless you want a genin-"

"No. Well, if it must be done, it must be done. I shall go find them and we will be off as soon as we can." His voice dropped in volume slightly. "Tsunade, don't worry. Everything will be fine."

"I'm not worrying, you idiot-"

"It's written all over your face, Tsunade."

She sighed again. "I can't be worried for an old teammate? Sending you off to Amegakure like that-"

Jiraiya frowned and his gaze hardened. "I can't make you any promises," he said darkly. "The leader of Akatsuki... I honestly don't know what to expect. I can't guarantee that I'll bring back Yamato and Sakura safely either. But you know it has to be done. We can't just leave them be."

"I knew that already," she murmured. "It's just... whatever. Go."

Jiraiya nodded and jumped out the window, becoming no more than a blur as he darted from rooftop to rooftop.

"... and please be safe."

* * *

"You're sick again."

Nagato pressed a wet cloth to Konan's forehead. She coughed a little and shifted under her blankets. Her eyes opened a sliver. And closed again.

"You should take better care of yourself. Only a fool or a crazy woman runs out into freezing rain when she's sick."

"I'm... not crazy."

It pained Nagato that her voice was so weak, but he decided not to seem overly worried. She was depressed enough anyway - his job was to cheer her up.

"I don't know about that," he smiled a little.

"Your jokes suck."

He sighed. "Just trying to-"

"I know, I know," she smiled a little. "But it's just not like you to do something like that. You were always so serious before-"

"Shh, don't talk. Let me take care of you."

Konan nodded almost imperceptibly and her eyes opened slightly again. She loved the way Nagato looked, now that he had found a way to restore his body to its original status using the Naraka path. Admittedly, she missed seeing Yahiko's body around, but... it was all for the better. Now their old friend could rest in peace and she could actually interact with her Nagato and not just some dead bodies.

She knew how much he loved her even though he tried to be emotionless. To others, he might have seemed so, but she could read him easily, probably because they had been together for so many years. She got the feeling that he understood her well too, though sometimes he didn't quite understand her emotions. Like now, when he was trying to cheer her up, when she didn't want to be. Actually, she never really wanted to be cheered up. It wasn't like she was so serious all the time, but she was more of a go with the flow type of person - she was happen when she was and depressed... well, the rest of the time. And angry a lot too, but she didn't show it like most people did. She had more of a 'cold temper' so it did not show as much.

Maybe it was a male thing. He always _had _to feel some way and everything _had _to be made right. To change a course of action or emotion, to make an impact rather than let things happen. And then there were things that she was stubborn about too. Like making sure her people didn't suffer. And especially important, making sure he didn't suffer. For all his ranting about pain, he didn't like it quite as much as she did - he wanted happiness and tranquility. _  
_

Okay, she sounded like a masochist, but she liked conflict in someways, and being hurt, because it gave her something to contemplate, a motive for doing something, anything, a purpose to live on. She felt like without pain in some form, she would just not bother living. Yes, Nagato hated seeing her hurt, but... he never understood that part of her.

Nagato held out a steaming cup of tea to her lips and she sipped at it slowly, trying not to cough in the process of drinking. Well, however much he didn't quite understand her, he knew how to take care of her, that was for sure. And she felt a bit better when he was just... there. Graced by his presence, not the presence of an almighty god, but someone just like her, a human, troubled by the issues that plagued the world. And her only real friend.

Konan curled up into a ball and tried to sleep but the searing pain in her forehead was killing her. She felt something small and round at her lips and opened her mouth slightly, quickly swallowing the bitter medicine and feeling the pain lessen somewhat.

"It is dawn," she heard his voice from above her.

"I am a night owl anyway," she whispered.

Nagato laughed softly. "So you are. Normally you are asleep at this hour."

She was silent again for a moment.

"Do you... have to go?"

"Not if you need me."

"It's alright," she panted with the strain of speaking. "I'll... be fine."

"I don't think so."

If she had the energy to, she would have rolled her eyes, but sleep was closing in on her quickly.

Nagato listened to Konan's breathing slow down, though it was still shallow and irregular, but at least it seemed like she was sleeping now. He knew her dreams had always been troubled after Yahiko's death, so sleeping peacefully might have been too much to ask for, but Konan was better at handling mental pain than physical pain. Though her tolerance for injury was amazing - he had no clue how she managed to suffer through such torment, day and night, awake and asleep, and still keep her sanity.

He knew she empathized with the people of Amegakure far more than even he did. It was almost as if their pains were her pains as well. Taking in the hurt of a country, as well as bearing her own, hearing terrible stories of war over and over, rape, murder, disgusting acts of torture, he didn't want to think about it. And then, he remembered that awful day, Yahiko's death, the day their hopes had been dashed and harsh reality had come crashing down on them.

Nagato curled his hand into a fist. Danzo. He vowed he would get his revenge some day-

No. He wouldn't. Because Konan wouldn't approve of it. He closed his eyes and rubbed his temples. Konan kept him sane as well, it seemed.

Sometimes, he felt like he didn't quite understand her as well as he should have, for being her friend for so many years. He knew he could never reach that level that Yahiko had, who had seemed to decipher her every motion, every little twitch on her face and translate it into an emotion. To one that did not know her well, Konan seemed incredibly cold and stoic, emotionless, detached from the world, but those few that did know her knew that she was very troubled by... well, everything. It was difficult to see on her face, that was for sure, but with careful practice he did notice how she frowned every time she heard something else happening in the war, from the little stories like a husband getting killed to an entire village being razed, and how sad her eyes looked, how her blue-grey irises almost seemed to cry but did not because she simply did not show her emotions so easily.

That was Konan. Holding everything in. Bearing it all.

He didn't understand why she felt the way she did about somethings. Pain, how she seemed to seek it out. Sure, his name had once been Pein, but that was a reminder of what he _had _suffered, not what he sought. He also didn't understand how much she seemed to hate people because of the horrible things they could do to one another, yet care about them so much that all of their hurts seemed to be her own. She had risked her own life on many occasions to save the people of Amegakure, and though she was not particularly... happy with the shinobi of other villages, she did not murder them in cold blood without good reason, unlike many of the other members of Akatsuki.

He knew that if she lost control of her temper, she might have become a warmonger like they were, like he had been. He had seen her when she was angry often enough. The slight narrowing of her eyes, the furrow of her brow, the frown, it was not particularly frightening, especially not with how quiet she was, but her reputation for being very powerful was enough to make up for it.

He didn't know how deep that anger ran, though. If it was just superficial or if it ran through her blood, rage commanding her soul. She could certainly be... impassioned at times, and she would do anything to protect those she cared about. Like even using her own body to shield him even though he was much more durable than she was. Or running out of chakra and continuing to fight because he was in danger. She _was _crazy.

He looked down at her again. Her breathing was still no deeper and highly irregular. Konan didn't get sick very often, but when she did it was usually pretty awful. Nagato sighed. He wished he could do more for her, but he was no medical ninja. For all his ability to revive the dead, he couldn't get rid of something as simple as a fever. He hated that.

He hated seeing her beautiful face in pain. He hated seeing her bloodwhen she got hurt. He hated seeing her worry for him. He hated leaving her when she so clearly needed him. He also hated the fact that she didn't want to be a nuisance to him. That she felt like she was hindering him when in fact she was just as strong as he was. Not in terms of raw power, but in many other ways.

He knew that she wanted him to go do whatever he needed to, but secretly she wanted him to stay at her side.

Nagato ran his fingers through her blue locks of hair, looking at her quietly. It was strange, how he could just stare at her for hours, at that beautiful face, playing with her very unique, cerulean colored hair, at the dark eyeshadow on her eye lids, which was totally unnecessary considering how shadowed her eyes were already, at the faint lines on her face that shouldn't have been there, considering she was still in her twenties, but were there because she had seen and felt too much. At the place where her labret had once been but was gone when he had laid Yahiko's body to rest. Nagato frowned once more.

Okay, maybe he had things to do today, but at least for now, watching over her was more important.

* * *

Three shadows passed through the forests of Konoha toward the Land of Rain. As they approached the border, they began to see the first signs of war and the devastating effect it could cause on the land and its people.

Villages burned to the ground, nothing but blackened ashes remaining. What few people still remained there were all homeless and starving, wearing only rags, ashen faced women bearing their children on their backs, not knowing if they could even give their kids a morsel to eat let alone themselves...

The three shinobi stopped and helped wherever they could, but their supplies were limited and it was impossible to provide for everyone. At least Yamato could put a roof over their heads, but there was not much else they could do.

"Except maybe give them a little money? Or food? I mean, we have plenty! And it's not like Amegakure will have nothing either-"

"Sakura, enough. I have told you already. We can't do _anything _for these people. I am not god. I cannot make food appear out of thin air."

"But we can just get more later-"

"No, we cannot. In the first place, it is not a good idea to show our faces around Amegakure too much, or we may attract unwanted attention. And, I hate to put it so bluntly, but our mission is more important than these people right now. Look, it's not like I don't value their lives-"

"Clearly, you don't."

Jiraiya closed his eyes. "Listen, Sakura. We are going to a land far poorer than the Country of Fire. I don't know how long it will take, but there are relief teams and charity organizations that specially come to help people like these, who have lost everything. We have given them shelter again and a little money in case they need it, but that is _all _we can spare. In the Land of Rain, there are no such things. Everyone fends for themselves, including children."

His thoughts traveled back to those three orphans, Yahiko, Nagato, and Konan. He had spent three years with them, taking care of them and protecting them from outside threats, and even then it had been exceedingly dangerous, so he had had no idea how they had survived for years without someone watching over them. And despite all their cheery innocence, they were not as naïve as one might have expected - no, they had probably seen much more than he had and experienced the worst of the war. And yet somehow they, well mostly Yahiko, had clung to that ideal of peace and hoped that things would get better. How incredible the incorruptibility of children had seemed to him, how amazing that people could still retain hope in such dark times - it had inspired him to strengthen his own resolve and never, ever deviated from his nindo.

And then they had died.

"Jiraiya-sama? Hello?"

He came out of his thoughts. "Sorry," he muttered. "What was I saying? Oh yes. Amegakure, is far poorer than you can imagine. If you think about how much we suffer during war time, think about how they are in the _middle _of the war with _everyone _fighting around them. And they are not even involved in the war itself. How unfair do you think it is to them?"

Sakura's gaze lowered.

"Look, I don't mean to be harsh on our people, but they have no idea how worse it could be for them. We're going to a place where there literally is nothing to spare for us. So please try to understand."

Sakura nodded and was silent.

* * *

Through the war torn lands they walked silently, watching as everything slowly grew worse and worse. From no homes and no food to dead bodies laying everywhere, scattered amongst the ruins of what were presumably their homes, to dead body _parts _scattered everywhere, amidst pools of dried blood and strange looking devices that looked like they could have been used for torture. Just maybe.

And Jiraiya's eyes darkened as he saw that these were not shinobi at all, but innocent people from Amegakure who had been captured because someone _thought _they might be spies from a different country. Wartime called for desperate measures, but this was just... too much. Way too much. They made graves for the bodies and moved on, and nobody spoke a word but there was an understanding between them. Hatred made people do things that were just inhuman.

They kept their hoods down as they passed the few that were still living, and when Sakura made a move to try to help them, Jiraya pulled her back and stopped her, shaking his head sadly.

She looked back at them with sorrowful eyes and saw that they had already given up on living, looking listlessly at the ground, ready to die at any moment. She turned away and held back tears.

_We help those who we can, _she had been told before, by both Tsunade and Jiraiya. As people who had both seen war, they understood to what extent a total war devastated a country. There was simply no way to provide for thousands of people by oneself. No matter how charitable one was, it was impossible. So, they _helped those that they could. We help those who still have the will to live to fight on and survive. Those who have already given up, there is nothing we can do for them anyway. Let us save our aid for the people who can use it. _That was what they had both said to her.

And yet was it so wrong that she wanted to at least give a little... something to these people who had lost everything? Anything at all, so that she might not feel so useless? Was it so wrong to want a world in which these people wouldn't have to suffer like that?

The first thing that had struck her when she entered Amegakure's domain was the aura of gloom that penetrated the very air. She didn't know whether it was due to the snow or the cold, grey sky. All she knew was that she felt a sense of depression come over her as soon as the snow began falling. The land where the sun never shone, Jiraiya had called it.

He had told her about his first three students, the ones he had taken up during the second shinobi world war. How they had retained hope in these times - how one of them, in particular, was like Naruto. And the other two, one a rather self deprecating, not confident at all boy, who was also the strongest out of all of them. Funny how that worked. But he had ended up being influenced by his friend, who had some strange power, the power to change people readily... right, as if she hadn't heard that before. Except, about Naruto.

And the last one, a girl. A very weird girl, who had seemed happy enough at first, but when he had gotten to know her a little better, there was a darkness in her that was not present in either of the other two, something that almost frightened him with how dangerous it could be. To herself and others, because she was going to turn out to be an exceptionally strong kunoichi, possibly stronger than Tsunade. A weird girl, who had loved the snow and rain, which complemented her extremely pale skin and seemingly delicate physique, one who had loved paper and origami, and mentally the strongest of the group.

It was clear that he loved them as if they were his own children. As much as Naruto or anyone else.

She felt really bad that they had died, for him and for the children as well, though the circumstances of the news seemed suspicious. It wasn't even like he had met someone and asked about them. No, he had received a letter that they had died, and that was it. Nothing else. Someone could have easily set that up, someone like Danzo, or something, who probably perceived them as a threat and wanted to pretend they were dead. Well, not necessarily Danzo, but there were a lot of people like him...

But, there was no point in brooding over that now. Sakura looked into the distance, catching sight of buildings in the distance, though they were still minuscule in comparison to her surroundings. That would be Amegakure, she supposed. Her head turned up and she watched the snow fall from the sky, an endless, dreary veil of pure white clouding her vision. She blinked the flakes out of her eyelashes and squinted, trying to see through the thickening shroud.

"Is something wrong?" Yamato turned to look at her.

Sakura shook her head. "No. Just thinking about the snow."

He looked up at the sky and then back down at the ground. "Yeah, we may need to stop soon if this gets worse. In the winter, all the rain that usually falls in Ame gets turned to snow, so sometimes it can get pretty rough. Jiraiya-sama?"

The sennin turned. "Very well. We'll stop soon."

It began to snow harder and the biting cold set in. Sakura shivered and seemed to shrink into her clothes, trying to conserve body heat. Brushing the snow off of her clothes, she looked at Amegakure again. _I can't help but get this weird feeling about these Akatsuki people. Why have they stopped moving around? Why have they stopped trying to capture Naruto? What are they doing now? They can't have just disappeared... _

_ I guess we'll find out. _

* * *

_It has been a while since Madara left with the Gedo Mazo. And here, when I finally have a lead on where he might be, war is about to break out. And Konan is sick. But I cannot just let Madara run around either. He's planning to do something with it, but I don't know what yet. However, something of that power, seven bijuu, cannot just be ignored. _

He sighed. _I wish I did not have to leave you, but it must be done. _

The red haired man closed the door behind him and stepped out onto the balcony. Jumping upwards, he soon reached the roof and had a striking view of Amegakure and the surrounding lands. The tower upon which he stood was not the tallest one, but it was probably the one fewest people passed by in the city. 'Angel's Tower', they called it, and not without good reason, for it was where Konan had lived for a long while now, and now where he did as well. 'God's Tower', although the locals didn't know it, was vacant after he had laid the six paths of pain to rest.

He looked at the city, still bustling and filled with life, although there was an air of dread about it - everyone knew that the war between the great nations would affect them, and despite their 'god's' power to keep others out of the city, there would be plenty of suffering in the months to come. As there was outside.

He turned a sorrowful gaze on the blackened land outside of the city walls and the pillars of smoke rising into the sky in the distance. _My country now. I wish I could protect you better. But with my reputation, pushing for peace is... too much. The only thing I can do is protect the city with my power. And while I am gone... _

He closed his eyes. The remaining Akatsuki would do his bidding, of course. Itachi and Sasori had their own reasons for obeying him, and it wasn't just for their selfish gains. Itachi... there was much about the man that was a mystery, even to him, but he knew that he was not the same as the rest of them, not someone who had been corrupted by the world, not someone who killed without reason or tormented others for his own pleasure. Itachi was... definitely more kindhearted than he let on. And Sasori? For all his rantings about art, he truly believed in it - the dream of an art that was eternal, something that would transcend life and death. And if Pain gave him a place to pursue that at, then that was all he needed. And it was a curious thing because Sasori said that he had given up making human puppets because they were too fragile and had instead begun pursuing an interest in developing a new material - he wasn't familiar with that type of stuff, so he stayed out of it.

But Kisame and Deidara, why they stayed was beyond him. Deidara was known to have a grudge against Itachi, so perhaps it was that he wanted to be in close proximity to the man to more easily find him when he wanted to kill him? But facts were facts, Itachi was stronger. _Sorry Deidara, but it's not going to happen. _Or maybe it was that he had some sort of relationship with Sasori... he didn't want to think about that either.

And Kisame. Kisame had seemed to be pretty loyal to Madara, so why? That, he did not know the answer to.

But the rest of his comrades, yes comrades now that he thought of it, were dead and gone, and despite some of them being rather... unpleasant - Hidan - he had still enjoyed their company. Although they were not truly his friends or ones that he could rely on. No, that title belonged solely to Konan.

Unfortunately, it was too much to ask her to defend the city alone while deathly ill, so the rest of them would have to help. Not that they would object, most of them loved a good fight.

He opened his eyes and looked back toward the tower. _I will be back shortly. Be safe while I am gone. _

* * *

"Get in."

"Are you crazy! You want me to get into that frog-"

"Yes," Jiraiya repeated. "Get into the frog."

Sakura sighed. "But-"

"I mean it," Jiraiya said jokingly, but then his face turned serious. "You have no way to get into the city without being noticed. I'll have to have you tag along with me since Yamato can't do it. Once we're inside, we're splitting up and you're on your own. Try not to get caught. Keep your face hidden underneath your hat and don't seem overly interested when you ask people questions. In case any one of us finds something," Jiraya took out two radio devices and gave both Yamato and Sakura one, "use these. We'll find a place to meet together and determine a course of action. Got it?"

The pink haired girl nodded, but Yamato stopped Jiraiya before the sennin could enter the tiny frog on the ground. "You won't be reckless? Tsunade-"

"Tsunade doesn't know what she's talking about," Jiraiya muttered. "In these situations, you have to be reckless - oh don't give me that look. I won't be stupid. And I won't do anything if you're not there. I give you my word."

"Alright. Then I'm off too."

The two men nodded and disappeared.

* * *

"Who are you?"

Sakura looked up in surprise. She had been on guard and well aware of her surroundings, so it was surprising that someone had been able to sneak up behind her. He must have been very skilled if she did not notice him at all. Who was he? She turned around and the blood drained from her face. That red hair, those youthful, almost boyish features, impossibly smooth skin, and of course, the black cloak with red clouds. He smirked at her, eyes filled with humor, but perhaps a little contempt as well. Sasori.

"Well? What's your name, lady?"

She shook her head, clearing her thoughts before responding. "Ayumi," she said coolly, taking care to keep her face hidden under her straw hat.

He looked at her suspiciously. "No surname?"

"Last I checked, shinobi do not exchange surnames."

He raised an eyebrow. "You're one too? Where do you come from?"

"The Land of Grass," she lied easily, smoothly. "Fleeing from the war. I heard it was safer here."

Surprisingly, the young man looked at her kindly. "Understandable. Welcome, Ayumi. My name is Sasori, one of the... guardians... of this city. I would hope that your stay in Amegakure proves to be hospitable, but... tell me, how did you get into the city?"

"I walked in?"

"The gates are closed and will remain that way until an order is given from my... superiors... that it be opened. Tell me again, how did you get in?"

She held her hands up as if in surrender, and smirked a little, allowing him to see her mouth but nothing of her hair or upper face. "Okay, okay, you got me. I snuck in through the sewer system. You really should have people guard those a bit better if you really want this place to be secure."

He raised an eyebrow. "Nobody's been able to do that before. Everyone gets lost without a map, and the sewers are lined with all sorts of magnetic materials so it's impossible to use any positioning jutsu to find your location? So tell me again, how did you get in?"

"Blind luck?" She laughed shortly, but stopped when she saw him frowning. Despite her humorous, relaxed tone, Sakura felt nervous, very nervous. Not without reason either. What was she supposed to say? I jumped over the wall? I can turn invisible and walk through solid stone and metal? No, and if he suspected anymore than he already did, he would ask her to show her face and see who she really was.

Sasori laughed curtly at her silence. "Obviously you're not a very good liar. That headband hanging from your pouch, it has a Konoha symbol on it. You're not from the Land of Grass. Secondly, you have absolutely nothing with you at all except, I'm guessing some ninja tools and some money. No major possessions, no spare clothing, nothing. If you really intended to stay here, you would have more with you-"

"Actually, I do," Sakura pulled out some shirts and shorts from her backpack.

Sasori smirked. "And wearing those in the middle of winter in Amegakure is suicide. I'm surprised you aren't afflicted by frostbite already. Clearly you're not from around here. And if you really are from Konoha, you had better hide that headband before someone tries to kill you."

_Shit. I'm an idiot. _"I, uh... wait you're not going to-"

The red haired man sighed and shook his head with the smirk still etched onto his face. "Look, you obviously have a good reason for coming here and hiding your identity. And clearly you're not a threat to us, so I'm willing to let you go, for now. We're not here to kill everyone that comes into the city, we just want to keep it safe. So quit your worrying. But you really should have been better prepared if you wanted to come here. Once the war breaks out, there's going to be practically no way out of this city. No safe way, that is."

_Wait. Since when was he so nice? Last time I checked, Sasori was like well... an asshole. _

"Well, are you going to stand there gawking at me all day or are you going to find a place to stay? This snowstorm is only going to get worse and you'll freeze to death if you stay out here."

"Err- well where are the inns and stuff? I don't exactly know this place very well-"

"They're mostly filled. Refugees from the surrounding area. Here, let me think..." Sasori pondered for a moment, then frowned. "Whatever. Can't think of any right now. Here, you can come with me."

Sakura frowned very slightly but nodded and began following the red haired man. _Well this isn't how it was supposed to work out, but if Sasori's here, then maybe the leader of Akatsuki really is here. Maybe I'll be able to figure something out from him or just by spying on him. But I'll need a way to hide my face and hair... maybe I can buy some hair dye or something... _Her frown deepened.

_But the way he's acting, it's bugging me. He's so... different from when I last met him. Well, actually, he's supposed to be dead. I wonder what changed. Maybe Akatsuki really has- _

Lost in her thoughts, Sakura didn't notice the sheet of ice beneath her foot and slipped.

"Woah-" She fell and hit the ground, landing face down into a pile of snow.

Sasori turned and she could have sworn she heard him laughing at her, but he still helped her up and - wow. His hand was somehow so warm- wait, that wasn't right...

"Aren't you supposed to be a puppet- shit." Sakura covered her mouth but the deed was done.

Sasori looked at her severely as she said it and then in a calm, cool voice, he spoke again. "Take off your hat."

"I-"

"Do it, Konoha girl."

Sakura bit her lip and took it off, revealing her pink hair to him, knowing that he would remember who she was.

And indeed he did. "You're the one who killed me," he said calmly, silkily. "What was your name?"

She was silent.

"Your name," he repeated, rolling his eyes. "I don't have all day, and neither do you, with how fast this snowstorm is picking up."

"H-Haruno S-Sakura," her voice trembled.

He sighed, pinching the bridge of his nose, as if she were troubling him greatly. Well, she was.

"Fine, Haruno Sakura. You're still coming with me. I'll figure out what to do with you later."

_What? _"You're not going to... you know... kill me?"

"I would _love _to do something like that, but unfortunately you could prove to be more... valuable alive."

"Sounds like a lie to me- why are you keeping me alive-"

"Just shut up and follow me. I have no intention of freezing to death today. Maybe you'll find out later."

"Um... err- okay," she flinched as he glared at her, and put her hat back on. They set off once again, only this time she could practically sense the man brooding in front of her.

* * *

"She's not responding," Yamato's voice sounded over the radio. "Perhaps she's busy?"

Jiraiya frowned deeply and look up at the towers of Amegakure. "We'll never be able to find her manually. But if we keep our link to her open and she's been captured, they'll easily be able to find us. We'll run the risk of being-"

"We can't just leave her-"

"I know that," Jiraiya closed his eyes. What to do? Was it prudent to jeopardize such an important mission and put both Yamato's life and his life at risk to keep their connection to Sakura open? But if he didn't, she'd never find a way back to them, and maybe she wasn't even in trouble at all, just buying something or- but she shouldn't have been unresponsive for so long...

In the worst case scenario, she was already...

But it wasn't so easy just to abandon her. Not just because she was Tsunade's pupil, but because one did not simply abandon his comrades...

"Keep it open a while longer. We'll wait and see. In the meantime, keep doing your thing."

"Roger."

* * *

"Hey, Sasori-danna," a golden haired man greeted the red haired one as he walked in through the door of the tower. "Bring anything home today?"

"Dinner," Sasori grumbled. Sakura filed in behind her and caught sight of the other man - if she remembered correctly, Deidara - who smirked as she entered.

"Dinner," he said slowly. "I see what you mean. But you know, we don't get to decide what to do, even if you hold a grudge against her-"

"I've gotten over it-"

"No you haven't-"

"Shut up!" Sasori stormed out of the room and Deidara laughed.

He turned to Sakura. "So, what's up?"

Sakura blinked a couple times.

"Uh..."

"Surprised? We're just as human as any of you guys are. I hear that Tsunade chick has a temper to rival that of master Sasori's."

"Uh..."

Deidara frowned. "What are you, mute? Say something!"

"Uh... hi."

Deidara facepalmed. "How did someone like you manage to beat Master Sasori? Never fails to amaze me..."

"I thought he died," Sakura said lightly. "I mean, he was a puppet before, but now he's-"

"Human, yeah. P- l-" _What the hell do I even call him in front of her? _"Uh... our, uh, leader revived him."

"He can _what?_"_  
_

"Revive the dead, un. You see - never mind. You can find out later. But he's, uh, out right now so the only one who can decide what to do with you is his partner."

"His partner - oh right, you guys work in pairs."

Deidara nodded. "But not right now. Snowstorm -"

"Yeah, I know," Sakura looked up at the melting snow on her hair. She looked back at him. "Are you guys, uh, going to kill me?"

Deidara facepalmed again. "You know how they say your enemies are worth more to you alive than dead? They didn't just make that up. And even if _he _wants to, he's prudent enough to know that it wouldn't be the best course of action for him or us."

"I guess that's reassuring."

"If you didn't know that already you're dumb, un."

Sakura glared at him and was taken aback as he laughed. "Like it or not, you're probably gonna be sticking around here for a while. So get used to us."

"But-"

"Unless you have a death wish, you're staying inside the city. Unless someone like you has some sort of what, invisibility jutsu or some way to get around without being detected. No? Yeah, I thought so."

"I'm not useless-"

"I didn't say you were."

"You were totally implying it!"

"I simply was suggesting that you probably suck at stealth missions-"

"Will you two girls quit shouting at each other!" Sasori's angry voice sounded from somewhere.

"Sorry! Forgot you needed your beauty sleep!"

"F-"

"Watch your tongue, we have kiddies around-"

Sasori appeared a moment later, wearing a simple shirt and pants, his hair still wet and plastered to his face. "I was not sleeping, you fool." He turned to Sakura. "Shower's down the hall to the left if you need it. Don't use the hot tub, it's broken right now."

"You have a hot tub?!"

"Yes, we have a hot tub. Are you always so surprised at everything?"

"No, it's just-"

"Yes, yes seeing us again and us acting _so differently _from what you expected has your nerves jumpy. So go take a shower then you can stay in the guest room and not bother me until tomorrow."

Sakura exchanged a glance with Deidara, as if to say _is he always this grumpy? _

Deidara nodded, and Sasori glared at him before walking out of the room again.

* * *

"Yamato." Sakura whispered into the microphone of her radio device. "Are you there?"

"Yeah," his voice came over quietly, so quietly that she could barely hear it. "Are you somewhere where we can talk freely or do I need to whisper?"

"Keep it down for now," she whispered back.

"Alright, so where are you?"

"I, uh, got captured by some Akatsuki people-"

It was silent for a moment.

"You what?!" A harsh whisper.

"Uh yeah... funny thing is it's those two that are supposed to be dead. Sasori and Deidara. But Deidara mentioned that their leader could revive people or something..."

Silence again.

"Jiraiya-sama should hear this. I'm connecting him as well."

"I'm already here. I've just been thinking."

"And?"

He sighed. "War is breaking out. We cannot stay here forever, but we cannot just break Sakura out either. We have a couple days at most before the battles draw close to Amegakure and it'll become very difficult to get out of here. A couple days to gather information, that is, and I highly doubt Yamato and I will be able to find anything useful. I've questioned a few shinobi already and they have referred to some sort of god in Amegakure, which I'm guessing is also the leader of Akatsuki."

"And why's that?"

"Haven't you realized? From what I can tell, you're located in one of the best districts in Amegakure, if not _the _best. Akatsuki seems to have considerable influence here."

She got the impression that he was frowning.

"Can you... handle yourself? Are they-"

"No, they said keeping me alive was more useful."

"Interesting. Normally they'd just kill you on sight."

"They seem different. Like a lot nicer or something. I'll be fine alone."

Jiraiya paused for a moment. "You do realize this connection is only local. Once we leave, there will be no way for you to contact us."

Sakura closed her eyes. "I know. But I'm kind of, you know... stuck. Look, I'll be fine. If I get any info, I'll find a way to get it to you, okay? You'll be able to deal with Tsunade-sensei?"

"I don't know about that," he said jokingly, but then turned serious again. "Hmm, in that case... we've got you inside their base already, but we can't pinpoint your exact location, and it will be suspicious if we just go poking around. We'll stay another couple days to see if we can determine who this 'god' is, but-"

"Don't bother," she replied. "He's out of town, according to them."

"Nothing like information from the source," Jiraiya muttered. "Who's in charge, then."

"His partner. That's all they said."

"Fine. We'll figure out a way to contact you later. For now that's it."

"Stay safe," Yamato's voice sounded.

"I'll be fine." _I hope. _

* * *

"Wake up, sunshine," a grumbly voice penetrated the world of Sakura's dreams and she yawned, getting out of bed.

"Sasori?"

"Yeah, we're going to see leader-sama's partner right now."

"It's still dark outside. What time is it?"

"Foolish girl. It is always dark outside. Although, it is darker than normal because of the snowstorm. However, it is not too bad right now. It might be the only chance we'll get to step outside."

"Ugh, fine. Just let me get a coat or something."

"Here," he threw her one. "Hurry up. We don't know when it's going to get worse."

"Okay, okay, I'm coming."

She got out of bed and threw on the coat, then followed Sasori outside.

The wind hit her like a brick wall with its sheer intensity and frigidity. She staggered and fell back inside, but Sasori waved at her furiously, urging her to follow. She gathered her strength then ran into the wind, nearly blown away by its sheer intensity. Sasori grabbed her wrist and forced his way through the intense snow, squinting through the veil of white toward a tower a couple blocks away.

"Just a little bit. Come on, don't give up on me, kid."

"I'm, not-" she gasped, trying to keep a footing on the slippery ground.

"This isn't even that bad. Keep going."

Sakura bit her lip and plodded on after him. Eventually, they reached a door to another tower and Sasori held his ring up to it. The door slid open and both he walked inside, helping her after him.

"Tch," he frowned. "Not the worst that we get during the winter, but not the greatest either. We might be stuck here for a while."

"Well what's wrong with that?"

"This is our _leader's place. _Well, his and his partner's place. He doesn't like it when other people come in when he's not here, especially when his partner's sick."

"He's sick?"

"_She _is sick, yes."

_"She?" _

Sasori sighed. "Why so surprised again? Is it that odd that there would be a female among the Akatsuki? Or, what remains of it..."

"Yes."

The red haired man rolled his eyes. "Whatever. It's almost night time so she's probably awake by now. Come, this way."

"What kind of logic is that?"

"She's nocturnal. Just follow me and stop asking questions."

Sakura followed him through a maze of halls and staircases, up toward the top of the tower. As she looked around, she saw that the interior of this building was a lot nicer than any of the other ones that she had seen in the city. There was the lack of prominent mechanical parts and tubing jutting out, as there were in most of the buildings due to their nature as industrial centers, or previous factories. Even though the outside of this tower appeared to still have all those weird metal parts and statues on them, inside the walls were smooth and painted with various designs and occasionally drawings. In particular, one that caught her eye was a couple with their backs facing her, a blue haired woman and a red haired man standing atop a mountain, viewing a breathtaking landscape beneath them. She stood there, entranced for a moment before Sasori tapped her on the shoulder and gestured for her to continue walking. As they reached the upper levels, the air curiously grew gradually warmer, rather than colder as she had expected.

And finally, they came to stop in front of another door, one with a simple blue flower painted on it.

"Now listen. I don't know her very well, but apparently she can be rather ill tempered at times, and I'm assuming this is one of those times since leader-sama told me she was really sick. So don't ask too many questions and just listen to her, got it?"

"Uh huh. But could you at least tell me her name? I mean, what am I supposed to call her?"

"Nothing. You're not supposed to talk - oh fine. Her name is Konan."

Sakura's eyes widened. _Wait a second. Konan... wasn't that one of the three orphans that Jiraiya-sama - _

"What? Do you know her or something?"

"No, but I - never mind. I'll take it up with her."

Sasori smiled a little. "Good. At least you're learning a little now. Just remember not to try her patience."

He walked up and knocked on the door. "Konan? It's Sasori."

No reply, but the door opened very slightly.

"I found someone from Konoha wandering in the village. A shinobi, Tsunade's pupil, actually. The one that _killed me _a while back. I've brought her here because, well, you're the one who's supposed to decide what to do with her."

The door opened wider.

"I guess we're supposed to go in," he muttered. "Come on, don't be afraid."

He opened the door more widely and the light from the hall spilled into the room. Sakura stared inside. There was a large window at the other side of the room, revealing the wrathful intensity the blizzard storming outside. The room itself seemed warmer than it should have been with the winter storm outside, but instantly, Sakura could sense a point of icy coldness from within_. _And a figure sat up slowly, her slender form shadowed by the light from outside. A pair of cold, blueish-grey eyes opened, filled with the same intensity as the storm that raged outside, terribly cold, yet not lifeless either, a pair of eyes filled with agonizing pain, the type that tormented a soul for years, decades, pain that seemed to last an eternity. Cold, not in the sense of cruelty, but in the sense of oppression, perhaps subduing her own emotions or forcing them back, not showing them to others, yet there was something boiling insider her, Sakura could tell. The woman held a hand up over her eyes, squinting into the light, and slowly her face became visible. And then she laid back again, closing her eyes, and her shallow breathing could be heard for a moment before Sasori moved over to her and stared down into her face.

"Konan?"

"I'm... fine," she breathed out. "The girl?"

"Haruno Sakura."

Konan seemed to struggle for a moment before she sat up again. Her eyes opened once more and she stared at Sakura, so intensely that the girl felt that she might be burned by that gaze. Her eyes narrowed as she saw the headband at Sakura's waist and for a moment immense hatred seemed to boil up inside her, but it was gone a second later. She closed her eyes again but remained sitting, a shadow in the darkness, a slender form outlined by the light from the hall.

"Jiraiya-sama knew you," Sakura blurted out suddenly, and the woman was quiet for a few minutes.

"I was... hoping you would not say that," she said quietly.

"Why?"

"I shall... tell you some other time," it was clear that she had difficulty speaking, from the slight hoarseness in her otherwise smooth voice and just from how weak she sounded.

"But-"

Her eyes opened again and her gaze hardened.

"Sorry."

"For now... we determine what to do with you. That story... comes much later... if it all." Her voice trailed of once more, and her eyes closed again. "What to do with you..."


	2. Tempest

Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto

"Speech"

_Thoughts_

* * *

Sakura flinched at the ominous tone in Konan's voice, but kept her face calm, betraying none of her nervousness. As if in response, Konan's gaze suddenly turned into a glare, cold eyes studying the pink haired girl intently. Those dull blue-grey eyes, filled with a terrible frostiness, dull with lack of emotion, reflecting Konan's stoic, level-headed nature. At least, maybe at first glance. And then the ice seemed to melt, and her eyes were then intensely emotional, completely the opposite of what they had been a moment ago, a storm of sensations burning within her, but contained behind a her mask of iciness. Then gone once more, and she - her eyes - were calm again.

"Sasori, leave us," she whispered.

"But - very well."

"Close the door behind you... I want... to talk to her in private..."

The light faded as the door closed and Sakura was left alone with the blue haired woman. She moved a bit closer and as her eyes adjusted to the darkness, she was finally able to see Konan's face in the dim moonlight from outside.

She seemed to be sweating slightly, her pale skin almost translucent and slightly flushed from fever and illness. There were dark bags under her eyes, which were painfully red from lack of sleep and sickness. She wore an apathetic, impassive expression, giving away nothing of what she thought, only staring back at the pink haired girl intently. _  
_

_She might be beautiful - strike that, she is beautiful - but she might be prettier if she __didn't look so serious... is she always like this? _

Konan opened her mouth to speak, but then she hesitated and remained silent, pondering over what she should say. What was there to say? Could she summon up the courage to ask about her sensei? About what had gone on all these years? To spill out what she carried in her heart, the years with the Akatsuki, pursuing a path that seemed right but was so very wrong... to relieve herself of the pain and beg for forgiveness because she had become the trash that she so despised, the trash that had killed her parent's and Nagato's and Yahiko's. Because she had done horrible things in the name of a just cause that was to be brought about by horrible ways... ugh, she didn't even dare think of it at the moment. But she couldn't just spill her heart out to a stranger... she couldn't even do that in front of Nagato. She would continue to hold it in, as always.

Konan coughed, her body shuddering from sickness, and frowned slightly, frustrated by something. Everything. Being sick. Being unable to do anything. Being helpless and useless. She suddenly looked away, finding herself unable to meet the gaze of the girl - yes, she was just a girl, one who had not seen much of the world just yet, not experienced what all shinobi did, the hatred, the need for revenge... and one such as she, supposedly an angel, but an impure one at that, how could she look such a girl in the eye? Konan coughed again, and when she removed her hand from her mouth, she found a bit of blood on her palm.

She grimaced and opened her mouth to speak but found that her throat would not permit her. She put a hand to her mouth and coughed again, this time much more violently, and felt the blood seep between her fingers. Sakura rushed over to her side, but then hesitated a moment. _This was an Akatsuki! _And even if she were sick - Konan closed her eyes and tried to breathe, feeling the blood trickle out of the corner of her mouth. Why was _she _always the one who got so awfully sick, even if it wasn't often? She had never seen Nagato get ill nor Yahiko, nor, Jiraiya-sama... life wasn't fair, was it?

She breathed out softly, wiping the blood from her mouth. And then she froze as she felt a pair of hands make contact with her back and a soothing wave of energy passed over her body.

She turned slightly and raised an eyebrow at the other girl.

"It won't do much," Sakura frowned. "You're sick, and it's not like medical ninjutsu can kill bacteria or viruses, whichever one you have. But at least I can repair the damage that's been done to your lungs and throat. Here, hold still."

Konan felt Sakura's warm fingers close around the back of her throat and sensed the energy flow again.

"Better?"

"A bit," she murmured. "Good. Thank you."

The first think the pink haired girl noticed was how soft her voice sounded, even with her throat healed. The blue lady seemed so mellow to her, at least at first glance, but there was also an intensity about her personality that took a different form than any she had ever seen. Not like Sasuke or Naruto, who were both very driven and stubborn in their own ways. Forcefully working hard to bring out their talents, to grow stronger, to change people or seek revenge. Like storms, they destroyed the obstacles that stood in their paths, like storms they affected everything in their wake, for good or for worse.

Not her. She almost seemed like the vast ocean, flowing, seemingly easily molded, but also unconquerable and infinitely stubborn in its own right. Capable of being tempestuous, wrathful, capable of being completely fluid, yielding as well. Sometimes affecting the things around it, sometimes a passive observer, but never until much later did one realize just how much impact the ocean could have. In some ways, the slow tide and waves were infinitely more powerful than any storm could be, though Sakura got the feeling that Konan was capable of being stormier than Sasuke or Naruto could ever be.

And then she was reminded again that the blue haired lady was an Akatsuki, one of those evil people that-

She found herself looking into Konan's face. She seemed so young when Sakura had first looked at her, maybe only a couple years older than she herself. But now that she was closer, she saw the faint lines slanting down from the inner corners of her eyes - _like Itachi's _- and the shadows around her eyes, and the slight furrow in her brow - she was older - well, she had to be-

"I'm 27," Konan guessed at the girl's thoughts. "Ten years older than you."

"You seem like you've seen a lot."

Konan's eyes softened from the terrible coldness they had held earlier, and suddenly she seemed very sad. "Yes," she murmured. "We all have, here in Amegakure. And you will too."

"So... I get to stay?"

"With me, yes," Konan said very softly.

Sakura froze for a moment.

"With you? But - your partner - they said he didn't like it when-"

"He wouldn't cross me. He... trusts my decisions." Actually, it was more like Nagato pretty much let her do anything she wanted, as long as it didn't put her in danger. He cared too much for her to really argue with her.

"But... aren't I supposed to be a threat to you? Like, how do you know I won't just kill you in your sleep-"

"You're not that type of person." Konan's eyes narrowed. "You... don't want to stay here? I thought it would be better than staying with those... guys... at the other place-"

"What's wrong with them?"

"Deidara and Sasori can be a bit, well, interesting at times-"

"I could tell," Sakura snickered a little. "Yeah, I'd rather stay here... though it's kind of empty."

Konan nodded and closed her eyes, feeling the pain in her body return. Sakura noticed and moved behind the other woman again, but Konan shook her head. She opened her eyes, and suddenly she was cold once again, a queen of ice, hard eyes betraying nothing of her inner emotions.

"Leave me," she whispered.

"But-"

"Leave," Konan said with a little more force. And then her voice softened again. "For now, you can just pick a room to stay in. I will deal with you tomorrow."

Sakura nodded and left the room quickly, sensing that the blue lady was suddenly very irritable, and she definitely did not want to experience what would happen if she set off Konan's temper.

_What a weird person. One moment she seems so human, like any of us, and then she seems like a victim of war, and then the next moment she's back to being completely inhuman again, like she has no emotions at all. _It wasn't in what she said, but it was in the body language and in the facial expressions, or the lack of them. Throughout their entire conversation, if it could even be called that, Sakura had not seen her smile, frown, or anything at all. Her face was like ice, her eyes frozen crystals, lifeless, and empty. There was no way a person could show that little emotion and still be called a person. Hell, when she had last seen Sasuke, even his face had showed more of his inner self than Konan's did of herself. The only thing that she could detect was a slight softening of the woman's eyes when she had seemed to be reminiscing of her past, and that was it.

Of course, it made all the difference. From being an ice queen to being terribly depressed, and then back again.

Sakura sighed and found herself in front of a door. Shrugging, she opened it and walked inside, finding herself inside a room with a simple bed to one side and some drawers and a lamp on the other side. There was a single window on one wall and Sakura walked over to it, staring at the snowstorm raging outside. An endless world of white.

* * *

"You overexerted yourself." Sasori entered the dark room, finding the blue haired woman sitting near the window-wall, staring outside, holding a hand to her mouth.

Konan ignored him and her head bent downward, blood dripping from her chin. She sensed him draw nearer, and suddenly she was irritated, irritated by her sickness, by the pink haired girl who knew _nothing _of their world, by him and the rest of Akatsuki, and by herself, because she was almost always irritated by herself.

"Leave me alone..." her voice was still no more than a whisper, bitter, harshly painful. Distantly cold.

"You know," Sasori muttered. "I don't know you that well. None of us do. I've only ever seen you in person a few times, and you never talked, you never even looked at us. If Pain was supposed to be distant from the rest of us, then you were in another world altogether."

Konan's mouth twitched. "Your point?"

"I don' t know. I suppose I don't have one. Just voicing my thoughts."

Her already half lidded eyes closed. "You don't know me... as you say. Do any of us really know each other? Or are we only lost spirits that found each other coincidentally..." her voice trailed off. Her eyes opened again, just a sliver. "Where do we belong? Who can we trust? Or are we doomed to be forever lost..."

"Deidara would laugh at you for being so philosophical."

Konan did not respond, and he sighed.

"Well, it's clear that Leader-sama trusts you. I mean, it wasn't hard to tell, even if you two were always so far apart from the rest of us. There was something between you two-"

"He was... the only one from that time... we spent many years together... we suffered together... aeons of endless war... Yahiko..." She said the last word so softly that Sasori wasn't sure that he had heard it correctly.

A name, perhaps? "Excuse me?"

Konan shook her head, seemingly lost in thought. She sat there for a long time, quiet, unmoving, pondering the events of her life, which seemed so long despite it only being not even thirty years long. But so much suffering, so much that she had seen, it made life feel like forever, each moment an eternity, fading into timeless space.

"Nothing," she said after a long while. "Just... leave me alone..." her voice trailed off again, and she sounded more exhausted than ever.

Sasori sighed, exasperated. "You know, I'm supposed to be here to help you. Pain specifically told me and Itachi to watch after you in case anything happened. He couldn't trust Deidara and Kisame-"

"I need no help."

"Yeah, right. Everyone needs help, and you're not exactly the most physical durable of us-"

"Do not underestimate me." Konan looked up.

The red haired man looked back, taking in the cold eyes, the dark bags underneath them, the redness at the edges of her blue-grey irises, the light sheen of sweat covering her face. Her skin, even paler than it normally was, had turned into a white color so pallid that she seemed ghostly, as if she were not even living anymore, a shade of the past. Despite the fever, Konan was deathly cold, a being of pure ice, a figurine perfectly crafted from snow, except she was human, like him, he had to remind himself. Sasori's expression softened very slightly, almost into one of - but he was a man. Men weren't supposed to worry, especially about people they didn't really know, right? Still, he found that he couldn't help it. _  
_

"Stubborn girl," he muttered. "Do you not care for your own safety at all?"

Konan laid down, her eyes closing as she rested. "I don't know. But I... have to ensure... the safety of Amegakure," she paused again, trying to keep from coughing. "It...is my responsibility... to protect our people... so that they may never have to experience... what we had to... I would... give my life for it..."

Sasori frowned. He was not one to talk like her, for he had abandoned his village, murdered the Third Kazekage, and killed many people needlessly in the course of his life, but he could understand her sentiments. As a child, he had suffered the loss of his parents, he had seen war as well, though perhaps not been scarred by it as she had, he had empathized with those who had lost everything because of the hatred that plagued the shinobi world. Despite his uncaring demeanor, he was not blind nor inhuman, just a little... not right in the mind at times.

To help others so that they might not have to suffer like he did, like any of them had, for in truth every one of them had their own story to tell about what _life _was really like, all the hardships, all the tribulations. It might have made one strong, but it also was painful. Was there merit in being weak but not having to experience the torment of losing one's parents or watching everything go up in flames during war? Perhaps. Not everything was about power. Not everything was about combat strength. Sometimes one just wanted to live a good life without too many troubles.

Of course, it was probably too much to ask for him to voice those thoughts. Still, he would at least show that he was sympathetic. He opened his mouth to speak, but the exhausted woman was already asleep, the quiet sound of her shallow breathing filling the room.

* * *

There was a picture in the drawers. Maybe someone had forgotten it, or maybe someone left it there on purpose, never wanting to see it again. It was very old - she had to brush off a layer of dust covering it to even seen what it was.

_This is... Konan? _

A younger, smiling, cerulean haired girl, a paper flower in her hair... yes, it was definitely her, though the difference was startling. The way her face lit up when she smiled, how happy she seemed, how bright - wait no. Sakura looked more carefully again and saw that the smile had not quite reached her eyes.

The eyes, gateways into the soul, they were called, and in many cases it was true. Back then, it seemed, she had had the courage to at least seem happy.

There was another picture next to it, one of the same azure haired girl, Sakura thought, although her face could not be seen in the photo. Angled downward, only her wet hair and paper flower could be seen, looking into the sky pouring everlasting rain over the grey lands, a heavy atmosphere weighing down upon the world... it was not clear what she was looking at, but a terrible sense of sadness filled her just looking at the picture.

A third picture in another drawer, this one framed, of an orange haired boy, who seemed to be trying to poke her... she looked _very _annoyed with him, and yet he looked so happy about it, clearly laughing even in the picture, and yes, the laughter reached his eyes... he reminded her of Naruto. She wondered who he was. Maybe they had been good friends?

The pink haired girl looked away for a moment, a pang of something clutching at her heartstrings. And then it passed, and she looked back, and found that she had cracked the glass over the picture. She bit her lip in frustration and set the picture on the drawers, next to the other two, and turned away again.

Something caught the corner of her eye - on the window ledge there was a vase with a single paper flower in it that she had somehow not seen before, hanging there delicately, seeming almost as if it were real, as if it were still alive, beating with life, flowing with energy. She carefully touched the fragile stem of the flower and sensed chakra flowing through it - perhaps someone had made it with a jutsu? Perhaps...

She looked back at the pictures, at the paper flower in Konan's hair.

And then back at the flower, at its drooping head, its posture suddenly seeming very depressing, somber, grave, lifeless, cold despite the chakra flowing through it... she found that she could not bear to look at it and tore her gaze from the flower, turning back toward the drawers.

Sakura opened the very bottom one and found another paper flower, this one slightly crinkled, worn, seeming to be years old... as she touched it, she sensed nothing in it at all - this one was only paper. A once beautiful paper rose that had been painstakingly folded by hand for...

She found one last picture underneath it. The orange haired boy again, alone, holding a paper flower in his hand, contemplating it. And a name written on it - Yahiko.

"Yahiko," she repeated, testing the name out on her tongue. "Yahiko," she said again.

And then, "Konan."

Sakura shook her head, feeling like she was crazy, and placed the flower next to the pictures, then turned back to the window, toward the other flower, which was drooping lower than ever. Sighing to herself, she touched the curved part of the stem just above the petals, stroking it gently, the neck of the flower.

One of the petals fell off into her palm and she jerked her hand back. "Did I-"

_No. This was something made by a jutsu. It wouldn't fall apart so easily unless there was no longer enough chakra to keep it together- _

"Konan," she breathed out the name again.

Why was she worried anyway? She was supposed to be the enemy - _screw that. I'm not here to play this whole friends and foes thing. She needs help and I'm the only one who can give it to her right now. _

Sakura moved to leave, but then moved over to the drawers, and without knowing why, she picked up the pictures and the flower and took them with her.

* * *

_From the frozen heavens tides of snow cascade down upon us, from the pallid clouds descend apparitions of tepid shells, hollowed mortals who know naught but how to survive without living, to draw breath without breathing in, to see without perceiving, to hear without listening, to touch without feeling, enervated spectres afflicted by ceaseless suffering. _

_When all hope is lost they give up, they let go, all that they once cared about, protected, cherished, they watch it go aflame, and passionless, they watch on, waiting for the flames to spread to them, to consume them as well. _

_And yet I hold enough hope for them all; all their passions are mine, their dreams are my dreams, what they have given up I take under my wing, what lives they have lost I seek to restore. But it is never enough. How much they suffer, how helpless I am to save them from the onslaught of the scorching fire that ravages our land, burning away the snow, laying the bones of the dead bare, felling the bones of the living to meet those already fallen. _

_But the ice around our hearts never melts, our glacial visages never break, and stoic, kindred spirits wandering this land, we are forced to continue on in our lives, moving forward without hoping for the better, fighting on without knowing why, living lifelessly in this hell because the next one will be no better. _

Konan looked outside at the void of white, at the snow tearing itself from the sky, speeding furiously toward the ground in flurries of icy ivory. Slowly, she felt the cold from the storm seep into her, a terrifying chill pervading her entire body. She tore her gaze from the window and looked down at her hands - _weak, powerless__ things _- then to the darkness of her room, gasping, feeling an awful pain build up inside her. _My people... my country... you are dying, falling before the wings of battle, and I can do nothing but sit here and be sick. How... how can I be so useless to you?_ She closed her eyes, brow furrowing deeply. _How useless can I be? My life, worth nothing, unable even to save a single other soul, then what good am I? If I can't do anything but save myself... _

She opened her eyes, feeling the intense cold chill the liquid forming at the corners of them, and closed them again, sighing softly as the chilling air began numbing the pain in her chest. And then opened her eyes again, looking down at her hands once more, her blue-grey irises soft, filled with a dark light. _I suffer, yes... but no matter how much I suffer, there are those out there that fight through agony far worse than mine. I must always remember... _She broke off and covered her mouth as she coughed out more blood. _Remember... that they are everything. And I am nothing. Just their guardian that has failed..._

Konan fell back down, dizzy from the blood loss. _Damn it... _Her body burning from the fever, her skin a frozen shell, muted passions numbed away. It hadn't always been this bad. She thought that she might have been happy, at least when she was younger, but even back then she had been drawn to darkness, conflict, and all of those things that other people averted. Pain, it let her know that she was alive.

Although physical pain was something she had never quite gotten used to.

Konan threw off her blankets and curled up into a ball, blue hair spread around her as the something seemed to sear through chest, burning her lungs and throat, interrupting the flow of her breathing.

_A blight spreads across the land, a putrid ailment, razing everything to the ground, blood splattered upon the once vital earth, now cold and dead, the slow ebbing of lifeblood mirroring our own slow death... _she gritted her teeth, and suddenly rage ignited in her mind, sheer fury coursing through her. _These self-righteous fools. How dare they harm my people, who have known nothing but suffering their whole lives, in the name of their pathetic villages, who only seek to consolidate their own gains at the cost of our lives. When will these greed and hatred end? _And then the anger left her and she felt bitterly disappointed once more. _There is no rest for the wicked, I know that. We, the Akatsuki, no... just me, the lowest of the scum, supporting a cause that would destroy the world instead of bring peace to it, waging war on all the nations in the name of justice... I am wicked. _

_And Nagato?_

_Nagato..._ she closed her eyes and felt the darkness envelope her body. _He was not right either. But I should not have been so blind that I could not see that what he was doing was wrong! He was wracked by despair, for it was, in a way, by his hand that Yahiko died... _

And then she was angry again. Why was it him and not Yahiko that had survived? At least with Yahiko around, her own despair had been lifted somewhat... she felt consoled, she had been understood. No, she did not seek happiness but at least not everything was pointless and horrible. Nagato tried his best, she knew that, but he couldn't compare...

And then she was angry at herself again, for thinking such stupid thoughts, for being so stupid. How could she think such things about her Nagato, who had been with her all these years, she supporting him and he supporting her? Even if he failed to understand her.

And then she was struck by another wave of pain tearing through her, and she did not care about anything else anymore, hell, she didn't even care about herself. No, she thought that if it was only her own body that she had to take care of, she would have just let go and died right there because the world was a fiery hell, and she, a devil, who belonged in the next hell anyway. But the blood flowing down her throat brought her back to life as she began coughing slightly again, a fine mist of red liquid spraying out into the air. _No... I can't give up. I have things to take care of. He can't do it all alone... he needs me... they all need me... Do they? Or will I prove to be able to do nothing..._

Another convulsion ran through her body and she curled up even more tightly. _Damn it... Nagato... where are you? Why am I always alone? Why - I guess I deserve to be. This is my punishment, isn't it? And I can't say that it's not unmerited... _breathing out softly, she tried to ignore her body's protests as she breathed, but failed. Even the slight movement of her chest was too much for her, it seemed.

She felt more blood trickle down her throat and before she knew it, she was coughing again, her body clenched up yet more tightly than before, her heart pounding in her ears.

_So that's it, huh? I wonder how Nagato will feel when he comes back and finds me dead..._

* * *

"Konan..." Sakura knelt beside the blue haired woman's shuddering body.

Konan's eyes opened slightly, and though the world around her was nothing but a blur of many colors, she registered the pink among the whirl of darkness.

"Sa-ku-ra," she could barely speak, and her eyes closed tight with the pain. Her face was contorted, her brow trembling, blood leaking freely from her mouth as she lay there, exhausted.

Sakura moved forward quickly and began using her medical jutsu on Konan, but this time, it had absolutely no effect. On the contrary, as soon as the green glow ended, Konan began coughing again, feeling the blood seep through her hands as her body shuddered from the violent expulsions. Sakura pressed her hands to the blue haired woman's back and tried again. _Her lungs have been damaged so badly... how can she even breathe? It's a miracle that she hasn't drowned in her own blood yet... _Konan's eyes opened slightly again, and she saw the sad expression on the pink haired girl's face.

"Don't give up," she whispered.

"Why... not...? Must... I suffer..."

"You can't - because... because..." Sakura pulled out the pictures from her pocket and showed them to Konan. "You have people who need you. What will happen to them if you're gone?"

Even in her delirious state, Konan could see the orange and blue on the photos, and instantly, her temper exploded. Quick as thought, she rose up before Sakura could react and pinned her to the ground, glaring coldly down at her.

"Where... did you... find those..."

_What the hell? How can she possibly be so fast while she's this sick?_ Sakura began choking a little and gestured at her throat, signalling that she could not speak while the blue haired woman's hand was there. Konan relaxed her grip slightly.

"The room I went into - in the drawers. There was this flower there too," she pointed at the paper flower that she had dropped.

Konan looked toward it and squinted, but was unable to make it out as the room began to blur around her again. She ignored it.

"Those... are private... you weren't... supposed to... see them..."

"I'm sorry," Sakura didn't have the heart to argue with a woman who looked like she was about to die. "They're yours, I thought you might like to have them back-"

And Konan's grip tightened again. "Forget... that you... ever saw them..." Her voice was a harsh, angry whisper.

"I... will..." Sakura gasped out as the other woman slowly began to crush her windpipe.

And then Konan bit her lip, closing her eyes tightly as she felt something burning in her chest, and blood began leaking from her mouth again. Her grip loosened and she collapsed to the ground, the heat in her body blurring her vision and senses, the world spinning all around her. Sakura's voice was no more than a distant sound among the ringing in her ears, and she couldn't even make out the distinct words anymore. _  
_

She felt the girl's hands touch her, and suddenly she was angry again, and shifted, glaring up at the girl.

"Don't... touch me..."

_Figures she'd be the type to hate being touched. But she's too delirious to really think straight. I'll need to work, fast, or she'll die. _Sakura moved her arms away and pressed her palms against Konan's back once more. The blue haired woman's eyes closed, and her breathing became even shallower.

She tried to open her eyes, but her eyelids felt as heavy as mountains. But struggling still, she forced them open through sheer willpower, as if in a gesture that she was still alive, that she wasn't giving in, and saw the spinning darkness of her room. She tried to turn her body, to get the girl's hands off of her, but the effor tproved to be too much and she nearly passed out.

Sakura felt the blue haired woman shudder as the coughing began again. Despite the heat in her body, Konan's skin was ice cold, as if she had just been outside in the blizzard, too cold for any ordinary person, slightly clammy as if she were the corpse of one who had recently died. That was not a good thought. She put more chakra into her jutsu and the green glow intensified. After a moment, Konan's coughing subsided and the pain left her face, making her seem somewhat at peace. Unless she had - _no, there's a pulse. She's okay. And her breathing is returning to normal. _

It was weird though. Looking down into Konan's face as she lay there, Sakura thought that she seemed so vulnerable, so weak, docile. Like something precious that needed to be protected.

"Sa-ku-ra..." Sakura nearly jumped at that sound. It had been a mere breath, a sigh. She was not sure she had heard that correctly. There was no way Konan could have regained consciousness, let alone speak. Her throat had nearly been torn apart by her coughing and her lungs were still not fully repaired-

But her eyes opening proved otherwise. At first, they seemed angry still, but then she detected a softer glow in them that simply made them see sad... well not quite... almost... grateful?

Konan breathed out a quiet "thank you" and passed out again.

Sakura gently pulled the blanket over her and watched the slow rise and fall of her chest as she fell into hopefully peaceful sleep.

* * *

"You what?!"

"Tsunade," Jiraiya held his hands up to try to calm her down. "It was the best course of action we could take. There was nothing else we could do, short of getting into a _very _bad fight with Akatsuki."

Tsunade sat back down, pinching the bridge of her nose. "Sakura..."

"I know," Jiraiya sighed. "I know, if Naruto was in the same situation how I would feel. I would probably barge right into that Akatsuki base and try to break him out, even if it would be a stupid move. But you're better than me, Tsunade. You know that such a thing-"

"Of course I know," she muttered. "Don't get me wrong, Naruto is _very _precious to me, but I also taught that girl for three years-"

"Yes," Jiraiya said, "_you _taught her. I know that if Naruto was in that situation... well, he'd be toast." They both groaned at that thought. "But," he started again, "Sakura has your brains and the willpower to keep her emotions under control."

"I hope so," Tsunade muttered. "Find anything out about Akatsuki?"

"Only a bit of information here and there. Sakura said that their leader is based in Amegakure but is currently out of the village. He also apparently has the ability to revive the dead-"

"What?!"

Jiraiya nodded, eyes looking into hers darkly. "I don't know this guy's powers, but he's the leader of _Akatsuki. _He's the strongest of them. That's who we're dealing with here. She told me that Sasori and Deidara were both there, clearly alive, when we confirmed their deaths a while ago."

"What about the others? Hidan, Kakuzu? They are supposed to be dead too. Did she see them?"

"No," Jiraiya muttered. He paused, putting a hand to his chin, deep in thought. "It is possible that she simply didn't see them, but I have a feeling they're actually dead. This jutsu to revive the dead, if it is real, must have certain conditions that have to be met before it can be used, and it probably also consumed an enormous amount of chakra. There is a time limit in which the souls still reside in our world and can be bound back to a body, according to the Third and Fourth, who studied the Reaper Death Seal. The body itself also has to be an intact body, and not just some puppet or dummy. The point is, even if he is the leader of Akatsuki, he is not a god. For now, we wait for more info, but when the time comes, we'll have to come up with a plan to beat him."

Tsunade nodded. "Anything else?"

"Well, unreliable source, and Sakura's impression, so it may not be true, but Akatsuki has apparently reformed. They are no longer gathering bijuu or antagonizing other shinobi villages. In her words, they seem 'nicer'."

The golden haired woman frowned, thinking deeply. "If true, this would be advantageous to us and to Kumogakure, since we are the only two villages with bijuu left. So they won't come after Naruto anymore. But we can't just forget their past crimes either. They have to be brought to justice eventually, but it will be difficult to deal with them on their own soil, and we definitely cannot spare the resources right now with this war going on..."

"Tsunade," Jiraiya looked at her meaningfully. "I'm sure you know this, but I will say it anyway. The whole shinobi world has still labeled them as wanted criminals, and the penalty for their crimes is death-"

"I wasn't saying we were going to kill them. Just bring them here and-"

"Once you bring them here, do you really think you can keep Danzo and the advisers, and hell, the whole village from killing them? Once they are here, it wouldn't be your decision anymore. If they have truly reformed, which may or may not be true, then killing them is not the answer."

"So you're suggesting mercy? After all that they've done?"

Jiraiya frowned. "If we kill them, there will always be others to take their place. Remove the Akatsuki from the picture and a spot opens up for new terrorists. And then we'd have to deal with all the connections the Akatsuki has already, who will probably try to get revenge on us for killing their... benefactors. Hatred breeds hatred, revenge breeds revenge. Kill them and the cycle just starts again."

"So be practical is what you're saying."

"And sympathetic. If they have truly turned over a new leaf, then we should not judge them on what they have done, but on what they are doing. It is never too late to make new friends."

"If their 'reformation' is even real at all. But let them go, and the advisers will never let me hear the end of it."

"My intel on Akatsuki is something even Danzo can't get. We can just refrain from telling them."

Tsunade sighed. "Very well, very well, you have a point. Is that it?"

"Yes."

"Then I have a mission for you. A very special S-ranked mission." Her voice dropped to a low whisper. "And please, _please, _do not be reckless on this one because you will be working alone. I need you to be safe. For many reasons."

"I will be fine, Tsunade," Jiraiya said reassuringly.

She nodded. "As you know, Iwagakure and Kumogakure are both at war with us and Sunagakure is going to provide assistance on our end. That leaves Kirigakure as the neutral one, but you can bet that they'll try something while we're all fighting."

"Of course. You want me to go there and gather intel? It seems like a bit of a waste of time at the moment-"

"Not at all. ANBU reports show a lot, and I mean a _lot _of movement in Kirigakure lately, from within the village itself and from outside, possibly from our friends the Akatsuki. No confirmed sightings of anything, but they took chakra level readings, and the results were, well..."

"Well?"

"Here," Tsunade opened her - new - desk and pulled out a file. She pointed to one graph. "Chakra levels here indicate an amount equivalent to that of _seven _bijuu concentrated at a single point."

"Akatsuki," Jiraiya muttered. "And beside it another powerful source of chakra. The signature is that of an Uchiha. I saw a reading on Itachi's chakra once, and those did not come close to these ones. Whoever this guy is, he's strong. And here, there is another one outside of the city. It seems slightly weaker than the Uchiha one, but not by much. I haven't seen that type of signature before, though. Perhaps the type of chakra related to a rare kekkei genkai?"

"I don't know. There are plenty of kekkei genkai out there that we don't have readings on, but this one seems too strong to be that of any ordinary one. This is a strong kekkei genkai, on the level of the Sharingan or even higher."

"This is definitely worth looking into," Jiraiya took the papers and looked through them closely again. "I'll see what I can find."

"Thank you. And be safe-"

"I know," Jiraiya smiled. "I will be fine."

* * *

It was still dark outside, but at least the snow was falling less viciously now and the wind had died down. Konan stirred slightly and she opened her eyes to the sight of dim light streaming into her room from the window, signalling that dawn had broken, although the sun never really rose in Amegakure. She blinked a couple times, then realized that the pain plaguing her body had lessened somewhat, at least to the point where it was manageable. Struggling to rise, she was forced to hold herself up against one wall for support, but managed, eventually to reach a standing position. Grumbling to herself, she threw a black kimono over her once white nightgown, which was now covered in bloodstains. Grimacing, she made a mental note to ask Nagato to buy her a new one, then took one slow step forward, hesitating slightly, not sure if she could move normally yet. But all was well, and she walked out of her room, slouching, because, well, who needed good posture anyway? It took too much effort to stand or sit straight, she had told her red haired friend many times, and even if it supposedly made her look self conscious - _oh well, he just doesn't get it. _Shaking her head, she shuffled down the hall to her bathroom, a room of pale blue tiles and stones that gave off the impression that the entire place was filled with water. A cerulean that almost matched her hair, and although she hated herself, she loved that color, her signature color. And yes, that meant that she liked her hair as well. She wasn't always self-deprecating.

There was a large basin in the stone, much like a large hot tub. Above it, bright white lights shone down from the ceiling, casting a cold glow downward, but other than that, the room was mostly dark once she turned the other lights off. The pale glow from the light cast down upon the mist in the bathroom, almost making it seem like a silken veil, fine and thin. She turned on the faucet and let the water flow in before slipping out of her clothes, waiting for a few minutes as the water hopefully heated up. As the tub filled and the heating vents kicked in, she started at her own reflection in the placid water.

She knew some people thought of her as beautiful. Nagato, Yahiko had, apparently this new Sakura girl did... many of the people of Amegakure, who said that she had 'angelic' beauty, well she was their 'angel' after all. But she didn't see it. She was just an average looking person, or even ugly at times, she thought, but definitely not beautiful. Although she did think that she looked a little better without that labret piercing, which she had removed once Pain had disappeared and Nagato was back to his old self. She was still used to putting on eyeshadow, though, and even as shaded as her eyes normally were, she still liked the blue tint on her eyelids. Seeing herself here without it seemed a bit odd. Her gaze traveled lower. She had never needed to shave. She didn't know why - she knew that other women did, she just didn't have any... except well, in certain places... but Nagato was the only one who had ever seen her - yes, not even Yahiko had - so that was okay. Besides, she liked having a little - _okay nevermind. _She blushed faintly at that thought and she moved forward, stepping into the water. _Tch. It's still cold. _She formed a few hand seals and the water began to heat up faster, steam beginning to rise from it, the heat feeling pleasantly warm against her cool skin. She sat their soaking in the warm water, feeling her strength, maybe, just maybe, return a little. But then she began coughing again, and the water was dyed red with her blood. _So much for that._

There was a knock at the door. "Hello? Are you in here... uh... what do I even call you?"

Konan looked at the door expressionlessly. So Sakura had come to bother her. Well, what was she supposed to do? She could still hardly talk, and besides, it wasn't like she wanted to be _too _cold to the girl after she had pretty much saved her life last night. Not that she really _wanted _to be saved, but she supposed it was for the better, maybe.

Sakura opened the door without waiting for a reply and Konan hissed slightly, forming more hand seals to make the steam around her denser. She hated being seen naked most of the time, with few exceptions.

"What?" Her voice was still no more than a whisper, but it didn't hurt quite as much to speak now.

"Nothing, I was just checking to make sure you were okay," Sakura muttered. "After last night, you know."

Konan rolled her eyes. "And this was a good reason to bother me while I was bathing?"

Sakura raised an eyebrow. "Well, what's wrong with that? It's not like I'm a man or anything. We're both women, right? You have nothing to hide."

The blue haired woman's eyes traveled down from the girl's face to her chest. And then down to her own. She blushed, scowling faintly, and the steam grew denser. _I have nothing to hide, except maybe a slight... lacking in the chest area, _she thought spitefully. _  
_

Sakura noticed her looking and blushed as well. "Err - I'm sure you're fine -"

"Whatever. I don't care," Konan said icily.

The pink haired girl laughed a little. "I didn't know you were like that. That's like... cute-"

Konan's face turned redder and her mouth twisted into a very strange expression.

"Wait, are you... _blushing?_"

Konan sighed and rolled her eyes again, sinking lower into the water, her blue hair spreading around as the lower half of her face was submerged. She closed her eyes.

Sakura moved closer and sat on the edge of the tub, facing away from the pale woman.

"So... how does it feel?"

"You're not good at making small talk, are you?" Konan's head rose above the water and she glared at the pink haired girl, who looked away, grinning sheepishly.

"Yeah... and I guess you're not the type to strike up meaningless conversations with people either..."

Konan looked away and was silent.

"Oh come on, I just want you to feel more comfortable around me-"

"Why?"

"Because I know you're a person like I am. Hell, you've suffered way more than I have. And I want to get to know you. And who that orange haired boy is. I want to see that you're not just an Akatsuki member, who all are supposed to be pure evil, according to my village. I-"

"That orange haired boy," Konan said with barely concealed grief, "is dead."

Sakura sat there for a moment, awkwardly silent. She sensed that something had stirred inside the other woman, some emotion that she had locked away long ago and never wanted to feel again, and -

"Oh," she said softly. "I'm... sorry."

It was quiet for what seemed to be the longest time again, Sakura just sitting there, back towards Konan, who seemed to be reminiscing about something.

"Haruno Sakura," she said suddenly. "Have you lost someone as well?"

"I... probably not the way you have."

"Then... you have parted ways. Like my sensei and his friend."

_Jiraiya-sama and Orochimaru. _"Yeah. We have. But we haven't given up on him yet. We'll get him back no matter what it takes. Because he's our friend. We can't just abandon him. But we also can't let him be wrong either."

"Then... then there is more hope for you than there is for the rest of us... or for me," Konan whispered very softly.

"What?"

"Nothing."

Sakura turned and Konan hissed again, the steam growing even denser.

"Oh come on - there's no reason to try to hide everything."

"My body? Or my life?"

"Or both," Sakura replied forcefully. "I mean, it's pretty obvious just looking at you. You've got body image issues. And you're like traumatized or something, and probably depressed too, and you probably have to deal with a lot of stress, and-"

"You could tell?"

"Well, no, but I'm just guessing. If you are, then you're doing a damn good job of hiding it, but still, you can't hide it forever."

Konan did not reply. She moved underneath the water again, and heard an exasperated sigh above her.

"You are, aren't you? You're traumatized by everything. War. A bunch of your loved ones dying, probably, seeing death everywhere, just... everything. You're depressed, aren't you? You-"

Konan's head rose above the water suddenly and she was clearly incensed. "You don't get it, do you? This _isn't _about me! It doesn't matter what has happened. I've _always _been this way-"

"What, hiding everything, holding it in? Trying to control your emotions?"

Konan nodded, still glaring at the girl angrily. "That won't change. And even if it does... _I _don't matter. _My people. My country. My home. _Your village's war is going to destroy them all, and I can't do a single thing to stop it! Every single one of those people is going to experience hell, a hell far worse than anything you've ever seen, a hell that-"

"You've dealt with your whole life," Sakura finished the sentence for her.

The anger faded slightly, and Konan looked away. "I said I didn't matter," her voice faded from its intense whisper and back to its normal, soft toned one. "But when I think that all of them have to go through that..." She closed her eyes. And opened them. "Enough. I will say no more."

"But-"

"Enough," she repeated wearily. "Please, if you're going to stay here, just be quiet."

Sakura opened her mouth to protest, but then thought better of it and merely sat there in silence.

* * *

They walked together down a maze of halls and stairs, and though she seemed colder than ever, Sakura knew that the other woman was brooding over something. She studied her carefully, seeing the still too pale skin, the tiny beads of sweat breaking out again, the slight grimaces that her mouth twisted into every time she had to suppress a cough - her illness would probably return in full force later. Then there was that pretty blue hair, now gathered into a messy bun with a blue paper flower pinned beside it. And those blue eyebrows furrowed slightly, maybe she was in pain? Of course, she would not admit to it.

She still took to wearing the Akatsuki cloak, but even beneath that bulky thing, Sakura could tell that she was too thin. Perhaps she was usually slender, slight of build, but there was no way anyone was that skinny - that was just purely unhealthy. Although, being that sick did things like that.

Sakura took her all in, the slouch and her shuffling feet, dark bags under her eyes; she must've been in pain from... something... but that expressionless face hid it all. Well, most of it anyway. Something about her demeanor cried out that she was hurt. Of course she was.

Konan turned to face her and they met eye to eye. That surprised her. Konan always seemed so much taller - perhaps it was aura of power she gave off, or maybe it was because she always seemed so distant, aloof - but now, she could see that the blue haired woman was pretty much her height, maybe a tiny bit taller because she was slouching.

Konan seemed like she was going to speak, but then she just shook her head and bit her lip in frustration. Sakura raised an eyebrow.

"Where are we going?"

"Why did you randomly start following me?"

Sakura shrugged. "Nothing else to do. Where are we going?"

Konan ignored her and opened a door, revealing the snow covered street in front of them. It was still bitterly cold, but not quite as bad as it had been the night before, with the powerful winds and snowstorm dropping the temperature even lower. The snow had mostly stopped for the moment, although the sky overhead was still covered in clouds, overcast, but somehow that didn't surprise Sakura anymore.

Konan stepped outside.

"Wait! What the hell are you doing?!" Sakura yelled at her. "You're still sick-"

"I'm also starving," she murmured.

Sakura sighed. "What do you think I'm here for? I can help you get stuff-"

"You're supposed to hate me," Konan said softly.

"I -" How to phrase it? "Of course I'm supposed to," Sakura admitted. "But I don't. So get over it. I'm going to help you, and you're going to like it. Now get back inside."

Konan looked into the sky. And then back at Sakura. "Fine. You know where the market district is, right?"

"Yeah. What do you have in mind?"

She shrugged, then rummaged in the pouch at her side and handed Sakura some money. "I personally like fish. Flame-broiled, not karaage. Too oily," she explained. "Pick up some rice and vegetables if you can, and get whatever else you want."

Sakura nodded. "Got it. I'll be back soon."

_Hopefully not too soon, _the blue haired woman thought to herself.

* * *

There was a special door, one that could not be found or activated by normal means, that only reacted to one thing.

Konan placed a paper flower in a vase standing on a table in the middle of the hall, and the door opened, revealing a staircase leading down to somewhere underground. Taking careful steps downward, she waited until her vision grew accustomed to the darkness, and then descended more quickly. Down and down she spiraled until at last she reached a room lit by candles lining the walls, the fresh scent of incense reaching her nose.

_So Nagato remembered before he left. Of course he would. They were the best of friends. He would never forget... _

There was a large pit in the middle of the room, filled with paper flowers, every single one of them folded by her hands and not her jutsu, because he deserved so much more than that. And in the middle of the flowers, a body, now devoid of piercings, its eyes closed peacefully, laying there as if asleep.

"Yahiko," she whispered.

From within her cloak, she drew out another paper flower and placed it with all the others. _If only you knew how much we needed you, if only you could come back to life and save this world from the hatred that engulfs it. Save us all. Save me... _

_Yes, I will be selfish this time. I need you. It has been so long, and yet I cannot forget, or move on. I still need you, to protect me, from everything, from myself... but you are gone, and with you, all of our hopes have died. I still fight for your dreams without hope that they will come to fruition, I fight for peace, thinking it will not happen. Despair rules my heart, and you are not here to take it away. Why?_

_Why did you have to abandon us? _

_Because, _she imagined him speaking. _Though you might not have known it, Nagato was more important to you than I ever was. You will see, in time, even if he does not understand you._

_You are both equally important to me. But he is here and you are gone. Is it not right that I think about you?_

_Eventually, you have to move on. Konan, you can't dwell on my death forever. You cannot dwell on what might have been if I were still living and-_

_And Nagato weren't? No, perhaps it would have been better if both of you just abandoned me that day and let me die. I always wanted to. There was no reason you had to die so that someone like me, who hates life, could live-_

_You don't hate life. Perhaps it is painful at times, but if you truly hated it, you would have died long ago._

_I... I suppose that is true. But still, it is not right that you had to die in my place-_

_I reside in the light, Konan. And despite the fact that I could understand your darkness, I was not a man of it. Nagato, he is a man of both light and dark, peace and war, pain, and tranquility. You will find that he suits you better-_

_This isn't about something petty like love! This is about what everyone suffers, and hope! If we cannot give them hope, if we cannot alleviate their suffering-_

_You will find a way. You always have. And you will._

_Will I?_

_Yes. Knowing you, you probably won't believe yourself capable of doing it, but you're not giving yourself enough credit. You're stronger than you think you are, Konan, in many ways. _

At least, that was what he would have said, if he were still living. She knew that already. But he was dead.

She pulled back the sleeve of her cloak and formed a paper kunai in her hand, then sliced across her arm, wincing slightly as the pain shot through her. She watched the blood drip down, and wondered why she even did it.

She wondered every time. Yahiko had discovered her cutting her arm by a river one day, and in his very understanding, but sternly disapproving way, he had taken the kunai from her and gave her a look that said _why? __  
_

She had been silent and kept her face smooth. She had washed the blood off her arm, then drawn her sleeve over it and they had walked back to their hideout together, not talking, not looking at each other, but she knew that he was suffering because she felt the need to hurt herself.

The weird part was that she didn't even enjoy it. It hurt, and it didn't take her mind off of anything at all. If anything, it only made her brood more. But she did it anyway, and she didn't know why herself.

Nagato had found out only after Yahiko died, and judging from all the pale scars on her arms that could only be seen when one was close up, he knew that she had been doing it for a long time.

And he had silently given her a look that said _why? _

And she was silent and kept her face smooth. And then his look had changed, and she knew that he had understood. There was no why. She just did it, and that wouldn't change, and he wouldn't be able to convince her otherwise. So, he had silently bandaged her arm and looked very sad, and she had felt so bad about it that she didn't let him catch her cutting herself ever again. Of course, he knew that she still did it when he saw a fresh wound on her arm every so often, but neither of them said anything about it.

_How ironic, _she thought bitterly. _I'm the one who should be supporting them in their dreams, their goals of peace, because it is also mine, because I also want this endless strife to stop. But in the end they end up supporting me, trying to take care of my problems, problems that exist for no reason, because they are just there without cause... _She sighed. She already knew she was a hopeless case. But she couldn't help but brood over it.

* * *

They ate silently together.

Sakura got the impression that Konan had seemed so docile before she had left, but when she had come back, the woman was all ice again. Still, she was beginning to learn to read the pale lady a little better - the more hurt she was, or the more she was brooding, the more distant she became. Something was bothering her, but she also knew better than to pry into Konan's thoughts. That would only set off her temper and earn Sakura a few glares.

She had never met someone so temperamental, so... bipolar, she would have called it, but Konan's moods, rather than varying between depression and extreme joy, varied between depression and some weird form of being extremely... submissive. A weird word to use, but she couldn't think of a better one. Usually, she was just cold though. Stoic to the point that one wondered if she even had any emotions left.

_Of course she does. And I'm going to find out more about her. She's going to let me into her head, little by little, and she's going to like it, cha - but why am I so determined to get to know her? _Sakura shrugged. There didn't need to be a reason. She was just going to do it.


End file.
